Teenage years are tumultuous times for kids (and for their parents). There is so much growth going on. Teens are trying their best to separate and be “grown-up.” This is a hard stage of life in our culture.

Your child might ask for therapy. Or you might suggest it. They might come to therapy with relief and willingness. Or they might come only because you told them to.  However it happens, our work in therapy is cut out for us. I listen and help put words to your child’s pain and confusion. I ask questions and I really want to know the answers. I treat my adolescent clients like the owner of their lives, like the adult they will soon become. We joke. They can put me down. I can laugh. I make it clear that they know their own life better than anyone else. I feel honored when they share that with me.

As I gain their confidence, I won’t betray it. And I will speak to you, their parents, with their knowledge and agreement only. If I think it is the right way to go, I will strive to have you and your teen talk together with me periodically. But it might not be the right thing to do. I will always, however, keep you, the parents, in the loop, calling you in to talk or taking calls from you when you need to talk. The guiding rule for me in working with children and adolescents is maintaining their trust and keeping them safe and growing.

Teenagers’ emotional problems may be hidden behind a variety of self-destructive behaviors. As a parent you might not realize the seriousness of behavior that looks to you like “kids being kids.” Looked at more closely, though, teenage drinking, drug use, and sexual promiscuity is not only a present danger but can become a life-long habit of coping. These habits become addictions.

The problems may be specific. The relationship of adolescents to food, eating, and body image is way of coping with stress. It is complex to treat and can have life-long ramifications. Social anxiety and shyness, lack of self-confidence, perfectionism, anger, sadness, and moodiness may all be reflections of low-grade depression and not just “a stage”. Psychotherapy for adolescents can help teens talk about and discover what they really need.